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Laurie Gould: Don

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GIVE ME A MUSICAL MAMMOGRAM!!!!

What is the sound of one hand blogging?

Early in March I took a tumble on some black ice and definitively separated my supraspinatus tendon from the shoulder bone to which it had hitherto been attached.  By the end of March, when it became apparent that no, my shoulder was not going to heal on its own, I took the obvious next step.

I started tomato seeds for the spring garden. Because a girl has her priorities.

Replacement Parts

My food processor isn’t working quite right.    The plunger no longer moves smoothly in its sleeve, and so grating potatoes is a hit or miss proposition.

The problem might be with the lid, which has a design flaw such that when it was sitting in the dish drainer and I inadvertently dropped a heavy cast iron pot on top of it, a couple of pieces of plastic broke off.  The problem could also be with the plunger, which looks a bit bent from having been pushed repeatedly into a broken lid.

My Internet search for replacement parts for the Cuisinart DFP-14N yields valuable information:   it is not a Lid and a Plunger that I seek, but a Work Bowl Cover and a Large Pusher!  But the Internet does not yield an actual DFP-14N replacement Work Bowl Cover, nor does it yield a DFP-14N Large Pusher.  There is a Work Bowl Cover for the DFP-14BCNY, which sounds promising:   maybe my DFP-14N is a subset of the broader designation DFP-14BCNY, if one accepts the hypothesis that my food processor is compatible with any replacement parts labelled DFP-14*N*, where * can be filled by any string of alphanumeric characters (including the null set). 

Mindfulness and Gratitude

Mindfulness!   It’s everywhere.  

A couple of weeks ago, on a cold Friday morning, I was living mindfully in the moment as I stepped out my back door.   I was mindful of the bright sun, which has been rising a little earlier every morning as March replaces February.  I was mindful of some green shoots sticking through the snow, sure signs of spring in this late-lingering winter.   I was mindful of the cold, clear air as I inhaled.  And exhaled.  And inhaled again.   And I paid attention to inhaling, and exhaling, and inhaling again, because when you’re being mindful that’s what you do.

What I was not mindful of – not at all – was the super-thin sheen of ice that had formed overnight on my otherwise cleanly-shoveled back porch.   So the minute I stepped out the door my feet went flying out from under me and I tumbled down the steps, with unfortunate results for my left shoulder.

Social Me-dia

I am a bit sluggish getting up the social media learning curve.

I have the blog that you are reading now, and the website where it resides.   I have a personal Facebook page, plus another for my musical alter ago; I have a Twitter account (that I use infrequently) and a Pinterest account (on which I never post; but Pinterest turns out to be a good way to research potential hairstyles).  

And of course I have a YouTube channel for posting my music videos.    I posted a new music video this week, in fact!   So far, it has 197 views.  

197 is a pretty insignificant number in social media terms.   5,000 hits is considered to be barely making a dent.   100,000 is the absolute minimum to be considered "viral."   Real social media splashes number in the millions.

Although I want to point out that if I were counting in Base 3, 197 would be 21,022.  Which is way more, even though it’s the same.

Ironing

Look!    A new music video!   Special thanks to Steve Ansolabehere for the aerial photography.

Netflix and Chill

Last weekend was a quiet one, and I found myself with some free evenings, nobody else in the house, and a lingering case of jetlag.  Perfect moment for Netflix and knitting.   

If it were less cold outside and I were less tired, I’d just go to the theatre, because there are at least half a dozen movies playing right now that I really want to see.   Isn’t that always the case?  And if I just turn to Browse Recent Releases, won’t I then run into all the movies from 2016 and 2017 that I was eager to see at the time, but didn’t quite catch while they were in active circulation?

For example: I remember that a year or so ago, before a Wim Wenders documentary about life in Siberia, there was a delightful trailer for a movie about a Welsh farm boy who makes it as a world-class operatic tenor.  Shouldn’t that opera movie be hitting the streaming services right around now?

I flip on Netflix, and I am greeted with a somewhat overwhelming array of choices:

Hell Outta Bat, revisited

On Wednesday evening I returned home from a work trip.   I had been teaching a course -- three full days in front of a classroom.    It's an activity I quite enjoy, but this time I was kind of sick, so by the end of it I was pretty fried.   Yeah, I know:  bitch, bitch, bitch.   But it sure felt great to climb into my very own bed and settle in for a good night's sleep.

That good night's sleep came to a an abrupt end at around 1:30 in the morning, when my younger daughter, home for the holidays from college, burst into the hall yelling, "There's a bat in my room!"  I believe there were also expletives involved.

High Security

You can't be too careful these days.   There are Internet thieves, election hackers and general evil-doers lurking around every cyber corner.   So WebWorld is working to find ways to make us safer, to protect our identities, to do business only after verifying that we are exactly who we pretend to be.

Thus security questions, the answers to which can be provided by you, and only by you.   These are items so deeply ingrained in your consciousness that the answers are always with you, and thus you do not have to write them down, because if you write them down then Russians will invade you home and find those scraps of paper and then we will elect Donald Trump.

I am generally mystified by security questions, because I find I can answer so few of them.    My favorite color?   Well, I guess I had official Favorite Colors when I was growing up.   When I was five, it was pink.   When I was nine, it was burgundy.     When I was 15, it was steel gray and fuck you.   But now?   Depends on the day; and even then, on most days I'd be hard-pressed to pick a favorite.  

Diagnosis

Just in time for cold and flu season:   a new music video!

Special thanks to funny lady Rebecca Ansolabehere for comedic inspiration on this one.

 

Leafy greens and perpetual pests

The tax bill introduced last week would (among other disasters) gut funding for affordable housing preservation and development--this at a moment when 39 million American households live in homes they cannot afford.  My working life is all about affordable housing preservation and development.  I am alarmed.

And so I am going to write this blog post about kale.

*********************

Kale became a big thing 5 or 6 years ago; 2012 was declared the Year of Kale (by whom, I'm not sure).  I'm pretty sure some other things, perhaps of lesser importance, also happened in 2012.   Nevertheless, by 2012, people were slamming back kale smoothies and toasting up kale chips like nobody's business.    According to the Internet (which as we know is never wrong), prior to the current Kale-splosion, the biggest buyer of kale in America was Pizza Hut, which used it as an ornamental on salad bar displays.

I have documentary evidence that I was growing kale as early as 2005 --- witness this photo from my 2005 garden:

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